Super Jangle 64

More... MORE! MOAR!!!

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Ey, Jim? Y'know that game Super Jangle 64? Yeah I reckon it's time that we uhhh talk about it. It is the main subject for this article, anywho.

Wha, Dave? You wan' me to explain all of Super Jangle 64 to ya? Alright then, here goes nothin'.

Err Super Jangle 64 is ermmm... it's uhh, it's a game m'kay? It's uhhhh... it's a game and uhhh not a show or uh movie and uhhhh it's unfinished as fuck so y'all can all just scurry off okei? goon, git, git! GIT MOTHERFUCKER I HAVE A SEMI-AUTOMATIC RIFLE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH

It is rated Utter Oblivion by the ERSB.

Gameplay

The open world gameplay with Jangle as the playable character.

Super Jangle 64 is a 3D open world action role-playing video game that is half platformer and half turned based combat. The game contains the largest open world of all time, exceeding the pitiful size of Grand Theft Auto VI's pathetic world 99x (times). Players completes various objectives in order to progress through the story. In the game, the player controls a sad virgin chud who's somehow still better than their canon counterpart and over 16,000+ other characters. Turned based battles are always triggered when interacting with any enemy and or boss throughout the game.

In combat, players decide whether to kill, flee from, or spare. Choices made by the player radically affect the plot and general progression of the game, with the player's morality acting as the cornerstone for the game's basis. There are two main categories/types of playable characters in the game: mortals and immortals. Mortals gain skills by leveling up, but can benefit from additional skills by equipping accessories meanwhile immortals do not know any skills initially, but instead gain skills by "linking" with a mortal character that is currently part of the battle formation, earning skill points in battle towards complete learning of the skill. Immortals also have the ability to automatically revive in battle should they lose all their HP; if the entire party is downed, including the immortals, the game will be over.

Story and Synopsis

In a sleepy and unsuspecting town, an introverted gooner by the name of Jangle has his giant hentai shrine mysteriously vanish from his room at three in the morning. Enraged, he goes on an insane, mind-blowing, reality-warping quest to retrieve his shrine and find and beat the shit out of the culprit. It eventually leads to him accidentally meeting and confronting the C.E.O. of Evil himself without realizing the culprit was him the entire time.

Setting

Set in the Saying Goodbye to the Omniverse Saga, the game is set across all of fiction as players explore multiple worlds filled with towns and disturbed, sociopathic paranoid schizophrenics, and are required to solve numerous puzzles on their journey. Players come across various NPCs, sex offenders, eldritch gods, sentient kitchen objects, self-inserts, and people who have no idea what the fuck is going on.

Locations

𝓕𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂𝓜𝓪𝓻𝓽

Characters

the main playable virgin.

The game features 16k playable characters, a shit ton of bosses, and 20,000+ none playable characters

Protagonists; Playable Characters

Jangle (obviously)
Pinja Norn

Contagonists; Bosses

None-playable Characters

An example of an NPC (non-playable) character in the game.

⠀
Dick Penison

Antagonists

Side of Light A.K.A. Forces of >>{[(『⊙𝕄ℕ𝕀𝕊𝕀𝕄』)]}<<

~<{ THε ΩVERS3ER }>~

Side of Darkness A.K.A. Forces of CECIL TURTLE

Plot

Prologue

In the dead of night, as the streetlights lit in a silent motion, lays: Jangle's house. He is sound asleep when suddenly in one swift motion, his entire hentai shrine mysteriously vanishes in the hands of an unknown thief. Eventually he awakens, realizes, cries, and cums before gaining the strength to step outside for the first time in his incel chud life to goon the adventure of his lifetime to bring the robber to justice (whoever they fucking are.) He yanks a lever underneath his bed to fling himself out of his house, which forms a hole on his door, which marks the end of the story shown on the intro and begins the game.

After he experiences a photorealistic portrayal of a panic attack after witnessing the world beyond his house for the first time in 12 years, he encounters a friendly turtle fishing on a rock named Cecil Turtle, who gives him proper advice and instructions to not just him but to the player on how to play the game. After like two minutes of convincing tutorial dialogue, he suddenly kicks Jangle in the balls and gives a brief monologue about his "intense, carnal" desire to kill and eat him. Cecil is then just promptly scooted off by a motherly CRACK addict by the name of Crack Miser, who calls Cecil a "motherfucking cocksucking piece of shit" and takes Jangle to his super secreted hideout shed in the Colombian rainforest to smoke weed and crack and also to teach the player more about the basic controls of the game. Here, he basically teaches everything you need to know about the game and thus...

THE JOURNEY BEGINS.

Chapter 1: Into the Outernet

After lighting up one CRACK too many (which ironically restores your HP in-game), Crack Miser slips on his dick and falls down a flight of stairs. Upon going down the stairs out of concern, Jangle soon discovers that Crack Miser is actually a DEA enforcer under the name of Hank Schrader wearing a weird Snow Miser skinwalker suit. Knowing full well he's been duped, Jangle immediately attempts to flee but is thwarted by Hank when he catches him in a net in order to confiscate his CRACK. He later admits to being an agent of "Dotar Surk", an unidentifiable, eldritch massive cosmic god beyond human comprehension that they view as "benevolent" but only because if he's going to fucking destroy all of reality in a fit of rage if they fight against him. Before dying at the hands of Jangle, Hank warns him that he won't survive out in the wild and that this "won't get him his hentai back", which is something he knows for some reason lmao

Soundtrack

Returning (Covers)

Song	Music	Artist
♪ Everlong		Foo Fighters
♪ Complicated		Avril Lavigne

Gallery

A conversation with ⠀.
A mysterious boss fight.
An ominous cutscene of the Turtle King: Cecil Turtle, standing in the dark and stormy night as he views the vile and horrific genocide he just committed.

Trivia

It was followed by a sequel called 46 Elgnaj Repus.
Crack Miser looks suspiciously a lot like Spamton.
Despite the game's name being Super Jangle 64, it is neither a N64 game nor is it remotely like Super Mario 64 lmao.
Jangle was so terminally online that he once called everything beyond his PC screen the "outernet". Respectively, the game calls the outside world "the outernet" as well, thus giving Chapter 1 its' name.
There's a sex scene where Hiei and Shouko have sex but you have to unlock it by beating the hardest bonus stage in the game, after that you can see them doing it as long as you want. Their 3D Polygons are super smexy. There's also a scene where Jangle fucks a cactus because he thought it was a giant penis.

Super Jangle 64

Contents

Gameplay