Rivers Surk
|
Rivers Surk |
|
|---|---|
|
|
|
| Real Full Name: | WEEZ-TRRRRHA |
| Alias(es): | Great King of Evil Ganondorf Peter Kitts |
| Biographical Information | |
| Sex: | Male |
| Fantasy Race: | Greencreed |
| Age: | 56 |
| Height: | 1,000 feet tall |
| Occupation(s): | Supreme DEMIGOD of Hyperdeath! |
| Characteristic and Familial Traits | |
| Likes: |
|
| Dislikes: |
|
| Relatives: | Dotar Surk Gerard Way |
“⠀⠀The world has turned, and left me here. Just where I was, before you appeared.„
— Rivers Surk
“⠀⠀„
— Rivers Surk's boss theme. (Super Jangle 64)
Rivers Surk, also known by his scientific name WEEZ-TRRRRHA (Cosmic: ⍙⟒⟒⋉⏁⟒⍀⊑⏃), is an NPC who for a long time sunshine was just a guy from Connecticut who liked singing. But then he would later discover that not only was he related to extraterrestrial creatures some fucking how, but is a direct son of Dotar Surk, the colossal eldritch god himself as he's green. In awe, he left Earth and aspired to be with his kin once again.
It's likely he either inexplicably created himself or that Dotar Surk himself created him out of the soil of a far-off extraterrestrial planet, centuries before Jangle was conceived on accident by his parents.
This is also a major plot point in Super Jangle 64, where he serves as the penultimate boss before Dotar Surk Himself and SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS Dotar isn't the true final boss of the game. There is a disturbed creature of more hostility and omnimalevolence than He. It could take only a true divinely prophesied hero of society to defeat it. Its name is........ Δ
A̶͚̣͆̍H̵̡̢̺͔̜͎̙̙͇̮̙͕́̉̆̈́̎͒̓͗͌̾͗͑͒H̸̛͚̿͛̎̀̌̒͂̏̐͝H̸̠̠̬͔͔̜̜̏͗͆͒̓̾͐̃̔͊̃͋̐͝H̶̟̣̤͉̠͚͔̥̘̪̦̬͇́̈́̆ ̶̨͕̹̮̗̝̲͖̖̳̥͑͆́̄̽͘̕͝Â̵̡̡̙̟̹H̷̢̢̛̭̠̙͈̞̖̘̮̺̄́̿͊͂̀̽͆͆̌ͅH̸̡̘͂̑̏̆̕͘Ḩ̸̧̡̡͍͖͉̰̫̝̹̤̻̦͒̉͛̆͋̍͑̂̂͆͜͝Ḧ̵͓̣̠̠̯͍͍̰̥̮̜͖́̓̊̈̌̈́̄̓̕̕͜͠͠ͅH̷̨͕͖̘̞̫̖̯̭̤̮̫͂̎̋̀͐̑͋̏̒͌́̑͜͜ͅḦ̶̼́̍͌̌̈́̌̓̎͐̃̀͘̕͠͝H̸̛̩̦͖̗̣̘̱̥̋̽͒͋̊́́̊ͅH̷̛͕̥͐̊̃̅̏̉̔̀͘ ̵̢̥̙̺͕͖̄̈́̈́͆́̈́͋̏̀̽̚͝͠A̸̬̺͈͆́̄͛̀̔̀̚H̸̰͕̝̩̥̙́̄͑̐̆̍̆̎̉͂͐͒́̀͋H̵̹͙̻̞̯̳̮͛͊̇̅̀̐̃͌̆̚͝H̵̝̄̃̈̍̓̍̂̏͑̀Ḩ̶̨̘̠̘̣̖͌̌͐́̆̆H̴͓̘͍̼͇͇̺̩̤̉͌͂̽͗̊̎̚͠Ḩ̵̨̦̱̩̞̼̱͚̃̚͝ͅ ̷̢̬͇̺̹̣̰̀́̅̐̕H̸̨̙̣͍͇̲͎̓͂̈̆̍̊̽̆̂͋̚ͅE̸̢͉͚̳̓͆̐̀̌͊̚̚͝Ļ̴̡̳͇̬̜̱̘̟̮̯̬̫̦͓͊̃͗̐̊͂̎͝P̵̢̨̘̲̝̟̙̘͖̞̖̺̆͗̋̄ͅ ̴̨̛̲̙̟͈̜͇̬̣̝̦̾̽̈́͌̌̂̓̏͜M̸̧̻̮̭̼̻͍͖͓̯̖̪͕̂E̵̛̹̩̻̹͓͎͖̰̅̇͋̌͂̒͜͠ ̸̦̔̈́͗̾́̌̎͆̕̚͜A̶̢̛̼̖̘̣̪͍̳̩̩̺̫̼͗̃̆̋̇̀͌̾̓̕͘͝͝͠H̵̘͓͈̊̐̀͐̿̔̓̋H̴̗͖̳̱̯͎̪͉̠͕̬̺͓̆̍͜H̸̢̢͎̗̥̦͕̻̥͖͒̃̇͋̆̕ͅH̵͈͛̽̆H̶͖̥͐̈͂̒́̽̅̾̒̃̚͠͝͝H̴̢̺̯̬̗̭͔͓͈́̌̓̂̓̒̉͗̾͝
Trivia
- Artistically, he comically stands out compared to everyone else like Clocko. This is the same for Dotar and everyone in the TRRRRHA family.
- I'm not updating his age every year lmao
- Dotar Surk sadly neglected him throughout his entire childhood before eventually disowning him because he hated his ambition to sing nerd rock instead of viscerally screaming heavy deathcore goregrind sludge metal lyrics. Thus, Rivers left him at 3.
- dotar loved the goregrind genre so much that he used to sing it as lullaby music to rivers as a little greenling.
- He is the father of scott the woz.
- He gave scott the woz the inheritable disease: virginity
- He was in annoying orange once.
