Capa Simulator 2015

The game's front cover

Caparezzonionachovich vs. the Neo Scary Overlords: Evil Demon Molesters and StrAngels Among the Masses in Big Italy Simulator 2015: Gold Edition (otherwise known by its shortened name, Capa Simulator 2015), is an open-world game designed for Microsoft's Games for Windows 108 Live. Released in 2011, the game received mixed reviews from critics and audiences alike for its shady marketing and development, but engaging and immersive gameplay, good graphics, and overall interesting experience. The game was nominated for a Scammy, but it did not win the award due to lack of evidence of the game existing outside of widespread anecdotal rumors. Scientists are still convinced that the game was a mass hallucination brought upon by God as punishment for destroying the psyche of Chris Chan and plunging the timeline into darkness.

Plot

The game follows the titular Caparezzonionachovich traversing Big Italy. The town is attacked by Evil Demon Molesters after the lord of darkness, supreme Neo Scary Overlord, and villain of the game "Ꮦጎ𐌌ጮ𐌙 𐌁ዪ𐌀ክ𐌃ዐ" opens a portal in the sky. The demons begin molesting the citizens of Big Italy almost instantly, with Capa being targeted by a well-endowed imp. Right before the imp is about to shove its giant demon schlong up Capa's poophole, Special Agent Drixobenzometaphedramine flies in and tears the imp's genitalia clean off, causing it to implode and disintegrate, its remains being sucked back up into the sky and through the portal.

After narrowly avoiding rape, Capa and Drix pair up to find the rest of their friend group to stop the demon invasion, and destroy Ꮦጎ𐌌ጮ𐌙 𐌁ዪ𐌀ክ𐌃ዐ to save the earth from destruction. After this point, the game becomes fully open world and the story is procedurally generated depending on the player's actions. The only real set goal is to destroy as many demons as possible and kill Ꮦጎ𐌌ጮ𐌙 𐌁ዪ𐌀ክ𐌃ዐ to beat the game.

Gameplay

The gameplay centers around roaming Big Italy and killing demons. To do so, the player must use different characters and items to most effectively destroy them and gain experience to beat the game.

Being a simulator, the game is entirely open world, and the player can progress at their own pace. The game world is filled with unique background characters, and every building is interactive.

Characters

Protagonists/Playable Characters

Caparezzonionachovich
Attack	65
Defense	35
Speed	70
Max Health	300
Type	Jack-of-all-trades

• Caparezzonionachovich

Capa is the first playable character in the game. He is first seen sitting in his home eating various pastries and drinking a coffee while watching the static on his non-functioning television. When he hears the sky portal being opened, he steps outside and stares at it. After a few seconds, he sees multiple people on the streets being molested by demons before promptly being grabbed by the aforementioned imp.

He is seen to be somewhat irritable, first demonstrated when he became angry at the loud sound the portal made when it was opened, angrily storming out of his house. Throughout the game, he rarely goes 3 lines in a conversation with someone who is trying to test him without snapping.

Being the first playable character, he has a mixed set of abilities to get the player familiar with the game's mechanics. The items that he can create are somewhat shoddy and break with prolonged use, but cover every category of item and can mostly be made with common materials.

Special Agent Drixobenzometaphedramine
Attack	85
Defense	95
Speed	30
Max Health	4000
Type	Ice

• Special Agent Drixobenzometaphedramine

Drix is a character available alongside Capa at the very start of gameplay. Unlike Capa, he is able to destroy imps without the aid of weapons by simply freezing them and grabbing them. Despite how tanky he is, though, he is limited by being an ice-type character. Fire-type demons are resistant to ice attacks and will thus be more difficult to take down without weapons.

Despite his somewhat arrogant nature, Drix is a very well-intentioned character who never attacks or gets angry at anybody other than the demons. He is seen holding Capa back from attacking multiple side characters throughout the game, and even temporarily freezes him when he gets too angry in the game's 13th cutscene before apologizing to the people he was threatening.

His attacks and abilities are mostly based around freezing enemies and the environment around them, since he is a cold medicine and was originally made to fight off flu symptoms. His crafting abilities are very limited, having only 3 items he can build that are meant to enhance his arm gun abilities.

Cory Baxter
Attack	75
Defense	99
Speed	20
Max Health	1200
Type	Brute

• Cory Baxter

Cory is a character that is unlocked upon visiting the Black House in Rome. Upon visiting the main office, he will appear in a spinning chair and greet the character you are playing as. His method of killing demons is to wrestle them down and tear them apart. He specializes in 1 on 1 combat, and will struggle when encountering groups. The lower his health is, the closer his attack stat will increase to 95, and his speed to 40. Both stats go back to normal upon healing to full health.

Cory is without a doubt the most confident character in the game. When fighting enemies, he will spout quips and crack jokes at the demons' expense, with some insults being directly tailored to the enemy type. He immediately takes to joining the main heroes and states that he's excited to fight alongside them.

He is an attack-focused character, having the most combo moves of any character in the game. When he hits enemies, there's a high chance of stunning them, which is useful when coming across grouped-up enemies. Often, he's able to kill smaller enemies with a single hit. His crafting abilities are fairly limited, being mostly pastry-oriented. However, items are not always necessary for him.

• Captain Flynn

• Stefan "MC Ride" Burnett

• SUPER. MACHO. MAN! (Unlockable Character)

Support Characters

• Caparezzonionachovizinno

A little version of Caparezzonionachovich that can appear when called by the player to aid with abilities and navigation. He can only be summoned as Capa and will disappear as soon as the player switches to another character. He floats in the air alongside Capa and is invincible to damage due to being non-physical.

StrAngels

StrAngels are special Angels sent by the in-game God to aid in defeating the Neo Scary Overlords and stopping the invasion. They each possess special abilities and specialize in destroying certain types of demons.

• ᏵዪᏖ፱𐌍ነ𐌊ፕ𐋄ጎ
• 🝍⎎⍧⅁☊⏙⎾⍓
• ƝǶȴǶ
• ᕓዪ𐌔ኡ𐌒፱𐌵ረ𐌀 𐌔ቹ𐌅ⶴ𐌅

Achievements

Icon	Name	Description	Condition