Mike Teavee
| “ | The FUCK you say to me you little SHIT! | ” |
--Mike Teavee | ||
Description:[edit | edit source]
Mike Teavee is known in history as the biggest chud in history of chuds, all chuds aspire to be him. His speciality is competitive gaming in the FPS genre, trolling and making YouTube videos of essays about alt history. Or streams where he cringes at internet lolcows.
Powers and Abilities:[edit | edit source]
Know-it-all: As a gamer; he must show no sign of weakness in his intellect, and has mastered the art of masquerading, to make himself appear smarter than he actually is, to the point people couldn’t tell he just got relevant information from internet doomscrolling.
Pistol Pistol no mi: It is his devil fruit and he can summon guns or canons from the wild west era, all the way to modern age weaponry. His favourite period is stereotypically German fire arms from World War II. It can also change his appearance to match said guns.
Shit eating: Mike loves to eat his mother's shit.
Personality:[edit | edit source]
He's a Gamer. I don't need to tell you what personality he has.
History:[edit | edit source]
When Teavee was born his first words were "u got gaymes on ur fone?". His first video game was Contra and since then he became the alpha gamer of League Of Legends, Roblox Slave Trading Experiences, Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2, Furry Sex Simulator 2k23, Prison Shower Experience, Cotton picking simulator and most recently The Colombine School shooting Doom wad simulator. He was the 4th ticket winner for Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.
The Mikey Show:[edit | edit source]
The Mikey Show is a talk show created by Mike Teavee himself and he interviews people from the Canopy Kingdom from celebrities to other stuff. He is the first gamer to have their own talk show and not get cancelled since, and the reason why is because the show was typically really boring, even by Twitter standards, despite trying to be dramatic. He made his talk show because he was extremely bored with the same bouts of toxicity he used to thrive with in his games of choice.
I Interviewed The Most Based Person on The Wiki:[edit | edit source]
I Interviewed the Most Based Person on The Wiki is an episode of The Mikey Show where he interviewed Cruel Fredrick to ask some questions about him. It was notable when Mike cums at the part where Fredrick whips Mary and other times where he abused her.
The Mikey Show : Shitcemberween Special :[edit | edit source]
The Mikey Show : Shitcemberween Special is a special where he talks why Decemberween is good and why santa is not real.
The Mikey Show: The Best Game Ever:
He interviews another kid named Lucas and asks some questions about him, however Lucas grabs his DS and forces Mike to play Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers Of Sky on live TV. At this point Mike gets obsessed with the game and distracted from the being a TV host, becoming the biggest OP at the PKMN Mystery Dungeon thread on the 4chan /vp/ board.
The Gloopening incident:[edit | edit source]
The infamous hacking incident of TMS. The episode has you ride a horse where he meets Johnny Joestar and then ask some questions to best cowboy until. That was until Augustus Gloop hijacked the episode to show a mukbang of only his mouth eating dismembered penises of various origins and properties.
People that Mike killed:[edit | edit source]
- Queen of Hatred
- 2 unnamed homeless people
- Byleth (Fire Emblem)
- Bowsette
- Hu Tao
- Brazilian Hatsune Miku
VS Mike Teavee (FNF mod)[edit | edit source]
Songs:[edit | edit source]
- First Phase - LV TV
- Second Phase - Gamer Moment!
- Final Phase - I Always Win (art of conversation) ft. Pewdiepie
- Secret song - The Gloopening (Augustus Gloop dumps chocolate on the Girlfriend and replaces her)
Death:[edit | edit source]
He died at the hands of a sigma male rival: Guru Ant. He shrunk Teavee with the shrink ray until he was too small to breath anymore. His last words before he was too small to be heard anymore were:
"Fuck you, N*/.';!!!..."
Trivia:[edit | edit source]
- His roblox user name is teaveegaming10002.)
- He once beat Ninja on Fortnite.
- He loves TV.
- No one knows why he specifically tried to claim a chocolate factory despite not giving a shit about such confectioneries and as a matter of fact, hating candy because it makes fat people, but many believe it to be him seizing his chance to become a CEO on his grind.
- He secretly loves Genshit Simpact.
- He has a rivalry with Chop Chop Master Onion for tv ratings.
- His true form is Mike "Alpha Gamer" Teavee