Pistacchio: Difference between revisions
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<small> For the neo Blood Debt version see [[Pistacchio Joe]]</small> | |||
{{Character|name=Pistacchio Joe|image=pistach.png|imagecaption=I blaze so hard I make the Noon High|aliases=Wow Wow | {{Character|name=Pistacchio Joe|image=pistach.png|imagecaption=I blaze so hard I make the Noon High|aliases=Wow Wow | ||
Westerneaboo|relatives=Master Joe (delusional about him being his father)|affiliation=[[Italian Mafia|Shadow Italian Mafia Gang]] (replaced by a man with a funnier name) | Westerneaboo|relatives=[[Master Joe]] (delusional about him being his father)|affiliation=[[Italian Mafia|Shadow Italian Mafia Gang]] (replaced by a man with a funnier name) | ||
Antishadow Italian Mafia Gang Destruction Squad of Mega Fucking Death|occupation=Gunslinga|favMeal=Chewing Tobacco|favGame=The Town With No Name (Wii U remaster)|hates=Filet-O-Fish, being betrayed, Fagottini, Eastern Italy (yuck), cheesy fingers from Cheetos, foot fetishists|likes=Slinging guns, louds, and sacks of money, Joerg Sprave|marital=he will be alone forever|birthDate=2005|birthPlace=Tu-tzu-han-su-hai, Mongolia|alignment=Tooting Shooting|crimes=Criminal patheticness, unlawfully bad breath, negligently low accuracy|stand=Gorillaz - Cling Eastwood|species=Cowboy (transrace) | Antishadow Italian Mafia Gang Destruction Squad of Mega Fucking Death|occupation=Gunslinga|favMeal=Chewing Tobacco|favGame=The Town With No Name (Wii U remaster)|hates=Filet-O-Fish, being betrayed, Fagottini, Eastern Italy (yuck), cheesy fingers from Cheetos, foot fetishists|likes=Slinging guns, louds, and sacks of money, Joerg Sprave|marital=he will be alone forever|birthDate=2005|birthPlace=Tu-tzu-han-su-hai, Mongolia|alignment=Tooting Shooting|crimes=Criminal patheticness, unlawfully bad breath, negligently low accuracy|stand=Gorillaz - Cling Eastwood|species=Cowboy (transrace) | ||
Mongoloid (In his heart)|gender=Mail|eyes=he has no eyes he only has flames coming out of his eye sockets and also the fire is very hot and alos very bright and also it can kill a lot of people maybe|hairColor=Male Pattern(TM) Baldness|age=n-2005 where n is the current year|ageP=5|portrayedby=Danny Trecho | Mongoloid (In his heart)|gender=Mail|eyes=he has no eyes he only has flames coming out of his eye sockets and also the fire is very hot and alos very bright and also it can kill a lot of people maybe|hairColor=Male Pattern(TM) Baldness|age=n-2005 where n is the current year|ageP=5|portrayedby=Danny Trecho | ||
Cardi B (stunt double)|themesng=Pegboard Nerds - Gunslinga (feat. MC Mota)}} | Cardi B (stunt double)|themesng=[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vIaPWxMPhug Pegboard Nerds - Gunslinga (feat. MC Mota)]}} | ||
Pistacchio Joe aka Pistacchio aka Joe is a gunslinger from a Western Shadow Italian Mafia Gang Department. He exclusively uses Colts .666, his stand, Gorillaz - Cling Eastwood and his insufferably bad attempts at trying to replicate southern accent to eliminatoriate his adversaries. Because being pathetic is not a crime in Palermo, he got imprisoned on false charges of not seasoning his chicken and not adding chili to thai curry. | Pistacchio Joe aka Pistacchio aka Joe is a gunslinger from a Western [[Italian Mafia|Shadow Italian Mafia Gang]] Department. He exclusively uses Colts .666, his stand, Gorillaz - Cling Eastwood and his insufferably bad attempts at trying to replicate southern accent to eliminatoriate his adversaries. Because being pathetic is not a crime in Palermo, he got imprisoned on false charges of not seasoning his chicken and not adding chili to thai curry. Pistacchio Joe was a right hand man of [[Gustavo Puppykicker Fring|Gustavio]] due to his funny name but then a new challenger appeared and took his spot. Pistacchio thinks that that man, Fagottini, is the one to falsely snitch on him. Now, he seeks to dispense revenge on Fagottini, 666 bullets at a time. | ||
==Early life == | |||
Pistacchio was born in a mongolian village of Tu-Tzu-Han-Su-Hai, Bayanhongor Province, Mongolia. He was growing up in a family of a lowly miner and was fascinated with the Wild West. Growing up with Clint Eastwood movies he ended up thinking that there is nothing more western than a movies made by italian directors, that are being accompanied by soundtrack, made by an italian who has never been to the United States ever. He barely scraped enough money to buy a mere Lacoste shirt, the cheapest Dior hat and simple panda skin assless chaps to pass as the least wealthy cowboy in [[Obacchio Bizarre Lucifer: Chaos Devil 666|Obacchioverse]]. | |||
== SIMG and DiGiorno == | |||
After selling his entire village to a soul of a Genghis Khan he was able to afford a flight to Italy. There he was looking for the most badass Bandito Group. While buying chocolate chocolate chip gelato he was unfortunate enough for [[DiGiorno]] to exist at a very close proximity behind him. After [[DiGiorno]] realized that the man before him shares the same name with him he got furious, stopped time, pissed in a pot and forcefed it to Pistacchio, killing him instantly with arsenic poisoning. But then the microparticles of the stand arrow in [[DiGiorno|DiGiorno's]] urine awakened Pistacchio's stand, Gorillaz Glint Eastwood, which leveled Pistacchio up, refreshing his spell slots, removing any status effects from him and returned him to full hp. Seeing such bullshit, [[DiGiorno]] was stunned. After standing back, Pistacchio asked [[DiGiorno]] to let him in a [[Italian Mafia|gang]] to finally larp as a dangerous man. | |||
He got appointed to work as a puppy conveyor belt for [[Gustavo Puppykicker Fring|Gustavio]], where he worked for some time. | |||
Latest revision as of 06:12, 25 August 2026
For the neo Blood Debt version see Pistacchio Joe
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Pistacchio Joe aka Pistacchio aka Joe is a gunslinger from a Western Shadow Italian Mafia Gang Department. He exclusively uses Colts .666, his stand, Gorillaz - Cling Eastwood and his insufferably bad attempts at trying to replicate southern accent to eliminatoriate his adversaries. Because being pathetic is not a crime in Palermo, he got imprisoned on false charges of not seasoning his chicken and not adding chili to thai curry. Pistacchio Joe was a right hand man of Gustavio due to his funny name but then a new challenger appeared and took his spot. Pistacchio thinks that that man, Fagottini, is the one to falsely snitch on him. Now, he seeks to dispense revenge on Fagottini, 666 bullets at a time.
Early life
Pistacchio was born in a mongolian village of Tu-Tzu-Han-Su-Hai, Bayanhongor Province, Mongolia. He was growing up in a family of a lowly miner and was fascinated with the Wild West. Growing up with Clint Eastwood movies he ended up thinking that there is nothing more western than a movies made by italian directors, that are being accompanied by soundtrack, made by an italian who has never been to the United States ever. He barely scraped enough money to buy a mere Lacoste shirt, the cheapest Dior hat and simple panda skin assless chaps to pass as the least wealthy cowboy in Obacchioverse.
SIMG and DiGiorno
After selling his entire village to a soul of a Genghis Khan he was able to afford a flight to Italy. There he was looking for the most badass Bandito Group. While buying chocolate chocolate chip gelato he was unfortunate enough for DiGiorno to exist at a very close proximity behind him. After DiGiorno realized that the man before him shares the same name with him he got furious, stopped time, pissed in a pot and forcefed it to Pistacchio, killing him instantly with arsenic poisoning. But then the microparticles of the stand arrow in DiGiorno's urine awakened Pistacchio's stand, Gorillaz Glint Eastwood, which leveled Pistacchio up, refreshing his spell slots, removing any status effects from him and returned him to full hp. Seeing such bullshit, DiGiorno was stunned. After standing back, Pistacchio asked DiGiorno to let him in a gang to finally larp as a dangerous man.
He got appointed to work as a puppy conveyor belt for Gustavio, where he worked for some time.